


Eugene Learns to Like Things Spicy

by Freebooter4Ever



Category: The Pacific (TV)
Genre: Bodyswap, Crack Treated Seriously, Eugene has zero spice tolerance, First Kiss, First Time, M/M, Snaf needs to fix that, Snafu helps Eugene out a lot, eugene is so in love guys, snafu is clueless, using the bad freaky friday trope but making it better hopefully
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-20
Updated: 2020-10-20
Packaged: 2021-03-08 22:27:07
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,103
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27104191
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Freebooter4Ever/pseuds/Freebooter4Ever
Summary: Snafu's biggest joy in China is exploring all the new culinary options after years of shitty rations during the war, but no matter where they go Eugene always orders plain rice and chicken. Snafu gets fed up and they have a rude argument over this in the middle of a restaurant. And the next thing Snafu knows he wakes up in Eugene's body. Of course, the first thing he decides to do is go out and buy as much food as he can carry, so he can prove to Eugene (who is currently using Snafu's refined taste palate) that spicy is better.
Relationships: Merriell "Snafu" Shelton/Eugene Sledge
Comments: 2
Kudos: 19





	Eugene Learns to Like Things Spicy

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you S-K-Y-W-A-L-K-E-R for editing this for me! ^_^
> 
> I loved the old bodyswap AU's in the mchanzo fandom, so this is inspired by a lot of those with hopefully my own weird spin. Also I tried to keep these two in character despite the silly circumstances. The nsfw parts mention dicks and hand jobs but nothing very explicit. This is 100% crack fic, pls don't judge too harshly, every fandom needs a bodyswap AU right?

Snafu becomes Eugene's designated "best buddy" during the mandatory extended vacation that is occupation duty in China. It drives Snafu insane. Whenever Eugene turns to the guys in their company and asks, "Hey, anyone want to go see…?" and details his plans to go explore yet another cultural site, all eyes turn toward Snafu, as if he's the one relegated to this duty.

The designation of being Eugene's buddy also comes with other duties. Like when one of the guys gets so drunk he smashes every window in company K's barracks and the snow blows in. The winter air is frigid, and even Snafu shakes in his bed wearing three layers of uniforms and still freezing. It's Eugene who crawls into bed with him. "It's too damn cold," Eugene declares, "Us southern boys have to stick together." A statement Eugene takes quite literally as he plasters himself to Snafu's back, creating enough heat to generate sweat between them. 

Eugene snuggles up to Snafu every night, it sets Snafu's nerves on edge. He doesn't sleep a wink the entire time they're stuck in that large windowless room with the other guys. He just wraps his arms around Eugene tight and makes every minute count.

The windows are never fixed, and the company gets moved to smaller officers' quarters - only two beds to a room. Snafu now sleeps four feet away from Eugene, in a twin bed more comfortable than he's seen in his entire life, with a warm radiator spewing heat into the middle of the room and all the privacy he could want. Yet Snafu lies there alone feeling colder than ever, listening to Gene in his own bed happily sawing logs.

Snafu also never tells Eugene that he was the one who got drunk and smashed everything.

Instead Snafu quietly adheres to Eugene's fatherly advice and quits drinking. He's already done it once, there wasn't much chance for alcohol on Pavuvu let alone any of the other god forsaken islands. So Snafu knows he can do it a second time. But he uses his buddy status with Eugene to make things easier. Eugene never drinks, and Eugene is always going out to do something. Snafu just follows.

Snafu knows two joys in life here on occupation duty: sitting around drinking alcohol and eating as many interesting new foods as he can find (and sometimes lying prone afterwards when his stomach reminds him that he's spent the past four years living off small portions of flavorless rations). 

Eugene is ambivalent to both those things.

Snafu and Eugene compromise on this. Eugene picks the sight seeing - Snafu picks the restaurants. It works okay. Except while Snafu's tolerance for unusual foods is merely temporarily lowered due to prolonged malnourishment, Eugene's tolerance never existed in the first place. Which Eugene complains about, regularly.

Snafu doesn't understand how a boy so obsessed with Chinese culture and heritage sites, can also be a complete chicken when it comes to eating anything with spice. Eugene survives Snafu's adventurous eating by using his knowledge of the local language to ask for plain rice and chicken instead. Every damn time.

In today's restaurant of choice, Snafu sits with his beautifully colorful food plate in front of him, and watches Eugene eat his sad bowl of rice with unseasoned steamed vegetables. It's enough to make Snafu despair.

Eugene's ability to speak the language also expands his and Snafu's range of exploration in the city. Eugene keeps a list (a goddamn List!) in his journal, and he checks off, one by one, all the places he feels he needs to see for himself before returning stateside.

The list grows continuously. Just when Snafu thinks they are done, Eugene befriends yet another local, gets to chatting, and ends up adding two or more new places to the list. And Snafu dutifully follows him around because Snafu is a fool in love, and fuck if that isn't the worst thing in the world.

Curse the day Eugene ever learned Chinese.

Actually Snafu is pretty impressed by how quick Eugene picked up the language. Eugene's ability to soak up knowledge like a sponge features high on Snafu's own list - a list of all the reasons he admires Gene. Snafu's list grows daily almost as fast as Eugene's list does.

"Snaf," Eugene's voice snaps him out of his thoughts.

"Huh?" Snafu grunts and stuffs his mouth full of extra spicy meat so he doesn't have to answer further.

"You're staring at me like I've disappointed you again," Eugene says, "You keep doing that."

Snafu doesn't answer and stares at his food instead. The food is very good. Eugene has no idea what he's missing out on.

Eugene seems to realize Snafu is in no mood for conversation. Gene starts lecturing on the history of the building they're in. Snafu enjoys listening to Gene talk, even if he only absorbs about half the content. Sometimes he gets distracted by Gene's mouth. And Snafu starts wondering about the way Eugene's lips might look sucking on Snafu's finger instead of clumsily trying to use a chopstick like a skewer.

"Are you listening to what I'm saying?" Eugene asks between bites with a wry smile.

Snafu repeats the last sentence of Eugene's historical lecture back to him in the same mocking tone of voice Snafu usually reserves for Leyden.

Eugene smiles, "Not good enough, I know you. With your memory you can parrot back anything without thinking about it. Don't give me my words, give me a summary."

Eugene is such a fucking teacher.

"I didn't enlist in the Marines to learn shit, Sledge," Snafu rolls his eyes.

"C'mon, indulge me," Eugene pleads.

That word - indulge. Snafu's eyes are drawn back to Eugene's lips. Snafu would exquisitely enjoy indulging in Eugene. If only Eugene would let him.

Rather than daydream raunchy fantasies, Snafu obediently replays Eugene's lecture in his mind from memory, picks out the important bits, and summarizes it in a crude fashion that has Eugene nearly face down in his bowl from laughter.

"I'm glad you are paying attention," Eugene says, his eyes alight.

"Yeah," Snafu says happily. He barely stops himself from adding, 'But I don't give a shit about history. I just give a shit about you.' Instead he stuffs his face with yet more food.

When they're finished and Snafu can't fit another bite in his belly, he leans back in his chair and scrutinizes Sledge.

"Snaf, you're doing it again," Eugene complains.

"You can't learn the history and refuse to try the food, Sledge," Snafu complains in return.

"I am trying the food," Eugene says. He tilts his bowl so Snafu can see how empty it is.

"Real food, Gene," Snafu snaps, "Not the watered down version for Yanks."

"You know I can't handle the spices," Eugene scowls.

"Only cause you haven't tried," Snafu taunts.

"I tried it once!" Eugene protests.

"No you didn't! You ate a single piece of spicy broccoli. And drank a gallon of milk. Ease yourself into it!" Snafu says, "Don't dip your toe in and say it's too hot. You gotta just go slow."

They're having a full blown argument in the middle of the restaurant now.

"No, I am not killing my taste buds just to satisfy your morbid fascination with watching my face turn red and eyes water every time I eat," Eugene argues, "I see that grin on your face. It never means anything good."

"Hey, I tried that flavorless leaf water for you, didn't I?" Snafu demands.

"Tea, Snafu," Eugene sighs, "It's called tea. And you love it." He crosses his arms and adds under his breath, "Especially when I filled the cup half full of milk and honey."

"Yeah but the first time you made me drink the stuff, I spit it out, remember?" Snafu asks.

"Tea is an acquired taste," Eugene is going all haughty and wiser-than-thou. One of Eugene's moods that Snafu can't stand.

"Yeah?" Snafu sneers, "So is spice!"

"It's not the same at all. Tea isn't painful to drink. Don't be ridiculous, Shelton," Eugene says.

"Don't be a chicken shit, Eugene," Snafu counters.

"You're showing your ass, Snafu," Eugene says back snidely.

They are openly glaring at each other when an elderly Chinese woman wanders over to their table, slides a tray between them, says something to Eugene that Snafu can't understand, and then walks away mysteriously.

"What did she want?" Snafu asks.

"She said something about an American delicacy," Eugene says uncomfortably, "for rude Americans."

"Ain't that just a fortune cookie?" Snafu asks skeptically.

"Yeah," Eugene says, "Want to break it with me?"

"Sure, whatever," Snafu huffs.

They each grab a half of the cookie and the fragile shell snaps in two. Snafu's half ends up with the fortune. Sure enough, as he unrolls the little slip he sees the writing inside is in English.

"A beautiful, smart, and loving person will appear inside your life," Snafu reads, "Fuck that shit, this must be yours." He throws the paper at Eugene (it doesn't go far - merely floats back down to the surface of the tray like a feather) and gets up from the table abruptly. He reclaims his hat from the hat stand, nods curtly at Eugene, and marches out of the restaurant.

Eugene scrambles to pull out enough cash to cover the entire bill, with an extra large tip, and an impassioned apology to their server.

Snafu glances over his shoulder as he pushes out of the restaurant door and catches sight of Eugene quietly pocketing the fortune.

Fuck Eugene and fuck his beautiful people.

He starts off down the street.

"Snafu, where are you going?" Eugene calls after him.

A number of curious onlookers stop in the middle of the street to watch them.

"Barracks," Snafu yells back, "I'm done for the day."

"Allow me to rephrase my question, do you know where you are going?" Eugene asks as he continues to try to push his way through the crowds to Snafu.

"Yes!" Snafu says.

"Barracks are the opposite direction, Snaf," Eugene insists.

Snafu slows to a stop.

Eugene catches up to him. "Do you have to make a scene?" he asks.

"Only funny when you're the one who starts it, huh?" Snafu retorts.

"Snaf, please," Eugene sighs, "I don't mind calling it quits for the day. I'll take you back to the barracks."

It is well known amongst the company that Snafu has no sense of direction.

"Fine," Snafu agrees. But he refuses to talk to Eugene for the entire way back.

Once in the barracks he still can't escape. It's hard to hide from someone when you share a room with them. 

"Are you really going to sleep through the whole second half of the day?" Eugene asks incredulously as he stands over Snafu's bed and looks huffy.

"Huh," Snafu grunts. He pulls the covers over his head, curls around to turn his back on Gene, and hopes the boy takes the hint to leave.

"Shelton, I'll try your stupid spicy food if you're going to be this much of a baby about it," Eugene sighs.

"I ain't the one getting packages of baby food every month," Snafu mumbles into his blankets.

"Yeah but you are the one eating them," Eugene reminds him.

"Your mom makes good apple sauce," Snafu mumbles defensively, "And strawberry jam."

"I'll be sure to let her know in my next letter," Eugene says.

Eugene sighs heavily again, sits on the edge of the bed beside Snafu's ass, and the next thing Snafu knows his hair on the back of his head is being ruffled. Eugene's hand then goes to rest on Snafu's shoulder. And stays there. For full minutes.

Snafu tries to ignore it and tries to imagine what kind of beautiful stranger might come into Eugene's life. Probably in a dress - probably blonde - probably a college girl, or worse - finishing school. Eugene got caught staring at a nurse on Pavuvu one time and the girl had been blonde. A nurse might make a lot of sense, actually. Someone smart, someone brave enough to travel overseas, someone with a kind bedside manner.

Snafu's so lost in thought he almost doesn't notice when Eugene's hand moves from Snafu's shoulder to the curve of his waist under the blankets. And then Eugene does something weird. He leans over, and kisses Snafu on the head. Right where Eugene had ruffled his hair earlier.

"Sleep off the bad mood, Snaf," Eugene says. He leaves the room and closes the door behind him.

When the door shuts and with Eugene gone, Snafu remembers that technically he pulled the fortune, not Eugene. And low and behold, Eugene fits every bit of that description. A smart, beautiful, and loving person came into Snafu's life. The fortune is true, Snafu just can't keep him. After all, the paper never said anything about the person staying.

And with that happy thought, he falls asleep.

~ ten magical hours later ~

Snafu wakes up on the opposite side of the room. This is pretty alarming. But it's not as odd as the smell. The blankets covering his head remind him of Eugene. He turns his face into the pillow, and breathes, and discovers Eugene's scent there too.

Holy shit, did he accidentally sleepwalk into Sledge's bed last night?

In a snap, Snafu is fully awake and upright. He looks over at what should be his own bed and finds someone sleeping there peacefully with their head under the covers.

This is also odd. If Snafu did accidentally steal Eugene's bed, he can guarantee Eugene would kick him out of it mercilessly instead of quietly taking Snafu's. Eugene is picky about the cleanliness of his sheets. He can invade and dirty up Snafu's bed all he wants, but Snafu is not allowed to do the same.

Plus the mystery guy sleeping in Snafu's bed looks to have a head full of dark curly hair.

Snafu throws his covers off and swings his legs to the ground to get off the bed and then freezes. The underwear he is wearing is way too blue to be his. His skin is wrong, his hands are skinny, his feet are extraordinarily long.

What if he is in the right bed? What if he's not Snafu?

Why did he think he was Snafu when he first woke up? He doesn't even remember drinking any alcohol last night. Is he going through withdrawal?

Snafu fishes the dog tags around his neck out from underneath his shirt. Sure enough, they say 'Eugene B. Sledge'. If he's Eugene, it makes sense that he didn't drink any alcohol last night. Eugene hates alcohol.

Actually, that might be a good test. 

Snafu carefully crosses the small room and avoids stepping on any squeaky boards so he doesn't wake the person sleeping in Snafu's bed. He crouches down and fishes blindly underneath the bunk until he finds Snafu's flask. He unscrews it and takes a drink.

Shit, that's worse than tea.

The person sleeping on the bed shifts restlessly and rolls over onto his back. The covers drop just enough to reveal his head.

Snafu's own face is not as terrible looking from a distance as he remembers it being.

"I can feel you staring, stop being weird," the Snafu in bed mumbles. He turns his head towards the wall and burrows into the pillow

And fuck if that's not a very Snafu thing to say.

Somehow this person in Snafu's bed is Real-Snafu and he himself is Eugene. He has Eugene's shitty taste buds. He smells like Eugene.

Why isn't he thinking like Eugene?

Or perhaps this is how Eugene thinks. Snafu's never been inside Eugene's mind before this. Or has he? For all he knows, Snafu might be on Eugene's mind all the time. Maybe that's why Snafu feels confused about his identity right now, maybe Eugene's thinking about Snafu all the time has progressed to actually thinking he is Snafu. 

This idea makes Snafu feel all warm and tingly.

He clambers over Real-Snafu's cot and insinuates himself in between the wall and Real-Snafu's body so Snafu is facing him. It's a little cramped, his arms are all tucked up underneath his chin to keep from actually touching Real-Snafu. He stares at the face across from him nervously. And then he leans in and boldly presses their lips together.

A kiss from Eugene Sledge; he's making Real-Snafu's wildest dreams come true.

Real-Snafu keeps his eyes closed, so the guy doesn't get to see his dreams coming true. But he responds by wrapping an arm around Snafu's - or, in this case, Eugene's - neck and pulling him in to deepen the kiss.

"Snaf…" the other guy sighs lovingly.

Snafu knows his own voice, he knows when he sounds loving, and that right there is the sigh of someone in yearning.

It's also a real fucking weird thing for Real-Snafu to say. He never refers to himself in third person. Until today, maybe.

Real-Snafu runs his hands up into Snafu's (Eugene's?) hair as they kiss passionately and then stops. His eyes snap open.

And he yells.

Real-Snafu pinwheels off the bed in his haste to get away and falls on his ass against the hardwood floor. Half the covers go with him.

"God?" Real-Snafu asks in awe, then clamps a hand over his mouth.

"I don't think so," Snafu says.

"Wait... Snafu?" Real-Snafu asks. His voice is the same but the accent is odd. He squints his eyes at Snafu as if by blurring the image things will make more sense.

"I think I'm Eugene," Snafu says.

"I'm Eugene!" Real-Snafu insists indignantly. Then, slowly, it dawns, "You're Snafu...but inside me."

"I wish," Snafu rolls his eyes and mutters to the ceiling.

"What?" Not-Snafu-Actually-Eugene says.

"Nothing," Snafu sighs, "Anyway, I like your body, it smells nicer."

"Yeah, probably because I take showers more often than once a week," Eugene accuses. He lifts his arm to sniff Snafu's armpit and grimaces.

"Can I keep it?" Snafu grins.

"No, you can't keep my body!" Eugene says.

Snafu falls back on the bed and giggles.

"Stop it! You're making my voice squeak!" Eugene complains. He shakes Snafu's shoulders. Eugene leans in close, but he doesn't look angry. If anything he looks...anticipatory.

"Wait, I have an idea," Snafu shoves Eugene off him and stands up. He dives through Eugene's beautifully clean and pressed stack of uniforms and pulls one on.

Eugene lies across the bed where Snafu pushed him and looks scandalized, "An idea to fix this?"

"No, even better," Snafu says, his voice slightly muffled as he tries to get his head through Eugene's tightly tailored shirt.

Eugene scoots forward on the bed, pulls Snafu toward him by the belt, and unbuttons Snafu's top two shirt buttons to help. "You make things so unnecessarily complicated," Eugene says as he guides the shirt over Snafu's head.

"I have no trouble with my own shirts," Snafu complains.

"Cause yours are all two sizes too big," Eugene retorts.

Snafu tries to slip out of Eugene's grasp and out the door, but Eugene plants his feet and holds firm. He straightens Snafu's collar, buttons him up all the way, and selects a tie from his closet.

"Why you bother with all this everyday…" Snafu rolls his eyes and does his best to squirm enough that Eugene ties the tie crooked.

"If you're going to go out looking like me then…" Eugene starts.

"I need to be you?" Snafu interrupts.

"I don't think we want anybody figuring out otherwise…" Eugene warns.

Snafu pulls at the tie around his neck and says with a grin, "Loosen up, Gene. Don't worry. Things'll work out."

"How are you not more concerned about this? Snafu, somehow we're not ourselves anymore, people will think we've completely lost it," Eugene protests, "Don't you feel...weird?"

"Not really," Snafu shrugs and lifts Eugene's stack of reading materials to find their shopping bag, "Like I said, your body's fun. I'll be back." He pauses in the door frame when he realizes he's a few inches taller now. Turning to face Eugene, Snafu stands tall, reaches his hand up, and easily touches the top of the door frame, and then, reaching just a tiny bit further, the ceiling. Snafu grins at Eugene proudly.

Eugene just laughs and shakes his head at Snafu.

"Stay here," Snafu orders as he gracefully slips out the door.

Another clue. Real-Eugene fucking trips over everything. He fell into a pool of maggots once, and Snafu had to hear about it for weeks.

It takes Snafu less than an hour to find good food. It takes him two hours to get back to the barracks. What slows him down is his appearance. Apparently Eugene is very popular. All the locals he runs into on the street seem to know him and most insist on stopping to chat. Unfortunately Snafu did not learn the language by osmosis, so he's forced to nod and smile and pretend to know what everyone's saying.

When he finally returns to the barracks laden down with as many parcels of food as he can carry, Eugene is patiently waiting on his bed.

"We're going to get in hot water over this," Eugene worries, "We didn't show up to anything this morning, not even chow."

"You've been worrying about that this whole time?" Snafu asks confidently, "Don't. We'll handle this. Half the time I'm forgetting I'm not actually you anyway, no one will notice."

"Snaf…." Eugene starts.

"Should probably stop using my name, though," Snafu grins, "It's Sledgehammer, now." He sways his hips proudly when he says it.

Eugene looks horrified. "I refuse to call you that," Eugene says grumpily.

"Sure," Snafu says. He opens all his packages of food and arranges the containers around Eugene in a semicircle.

"That's a lot of food," Eugene comments. He moved from the bed and sits cross legged on the floor across from Snafu.

"You don't have to eat it all, you just have to try it," Snafu says as he pops open the first container. He picks out the best bits with chopsticks and holds his hand aloft.

"I am not a bird. You will not feed me like this," Eugene crosses his arms.

"If I let you handle the chopsticks we'd be here all day," Snafu argues, "Open up. Cheep, cheep!"

"Why not just go steal a fork from the chow line?" Eugene whines.

"You really want me out in public in the chow hall?" Snafu leers at him, "Like this?" He twirls a lock of bright red hair on his finger.

Eugene huffs, but he must recognize how bad of an idea it would be to let anyone else in their company see Snafu as him, because Eugene quickly decides to open his mouth and let Snafu drop the food in.

Once Eugene starts chewing his expression changes drastically. "That's amazing!" He enthusiastically reaches for the bowl and chopsticks.

"Wait, be patient. Drink water," Snafu directs. He holds the chopsticks out of reach and points at the bottle he brought, "And then try this one. It's slightly spicier." He pops open a new container, reloads the chopsticks, and hovers the food in front of Eugene's face.

One by one they go through every dish, and Eugene discovers he enjoys them all.

Snafu also tries to teach him how to use chopsticks but for someone who has flawless penmanship on his best days, Eugene is not particularly dexterous even in Snafu's body. Eugene drops food more often than he gets it in his mouth. A horrible waste, that is.

Snafu is taunting Eugene and waving the chopsticks with a single piece of broccoli over Eugene's mouth when Burgie opens their door.

Eugene and Snafu freeze guiltily.

"You two have the weirdest hobbies," Burgie says.

Eugene and Snafu exchange glances.

"Care to explain why you both have been shirking your duties all day? Bill says he saw you going awol?" Burgie asks.

"We're expanding my spice tolerance," Snafu explains. He pops the food he was teasing Eugene with in his own mouth and grins at Gene while he chews. Unfortunately he currently has Eugene's taste buds instead of his own sophisticated palate. Spice explodes in his mouth. He doubles over, spits the chicken into his lap and grabs the entire jug of water. Eugene, meanwhile, howls with laughter.

"Do you need a tissue to dry those tears?" Eugene asks Snafu and passes him a handkerchief.

Snafu dabs at his eyes, which are streaming painfully. "I think my soul left my body for a minute there," Snafu says, clutching a hand to his heart.

"I changed my mind," Burgie says after watching them in action, "No explanation needed. I'll leave you boys to it. Snafu, try not to kill Sledgehammer."

Snafu opens his mouth to respond, but Eugene kicks his shin before he gets a chance.

"Sure thing, Burgie," Eugene promises.

"Have fun," Burgie says as he leaves with a smile.

"Does this mean I can still kill you, if only my body made the promise and not me?" Snafu asks. He picks out the least spicy dish arrayed in front of them and eats a few bites. Even that burns. Perhaps he should have gone easier on Gene back at the restaurant. The boy's taste palate is shameful.

"You better treat my body right, Snafu," Eugene teases.

Snafu cackles, "Oh, the places I could go with that sentence!"

"That's not…" Eugene stammers, "You know what I meant."

Snafu grins at him admiringly. "You know...," he says and leans back against his bed, "Remember yesterday how you were complaining about me staring at you while you eat spicy foods because your face turns red and blotchy?"

"I do," Eugene says.

"I only stare cause I like to watch you blush," Snafu says.

Eugene rolls his eyes and continues eating.

"You get all bashful and smiley," Snafu adds.

"I do not," Eugene counters.

"Yeah you do," Snafu says confidently, "See you're doing it right now and you're not even in your own pasty body. Who knew my face could flush."

Eugene cleverly flicks the chopsticks to catapult a clump of rice at him.

Snafu laughs and ducks. The rice splats against the wall behind his head. "I regret teaching you how to use those," he says. 

Eugene grins at him and turns back to his meal. But rather than eat it, he plays with his food - picking it up with his chopsticks and letting it fall back into the dish. "Why were you kissing me?" he asks quietly, "This morning, I mean."

Snafu is at an immediate loss for words. He quickly tries to invent a reason better than 'making the dreams of Real-Snafu come true.'

He can't.

Snafu shrugs instead and tries to brush it off like the kiss is inconsequential. "Needed to wake you up," he says feebly.

"That makes no sense," Eugene says with a sigh, "There are easier ways to wake people up." He stares at Snafu, and Snafu fidgets under his scrutiny. Eugene gives him a small smile and shakes his head, "God, it's weird seeing my body look like you."

"Look like me?" Snafu repeats.

"The way you move," Eugene says and lifts his own wrist for emphasis, "It's all you. Even when you're not...you."

Snafu leans his chin on his hand, smiles at Eugene, and wonders how little effort it would take him to get Eugene to blush again. "You've been watching me move?" he asks.

Eugene's eyes go wide, "Not like how you are implying."

"You know," Snafu stretches his arms above his head, "Your body is wound awful tight, I can feel it; I could help you relax." He drops his arms to his sides and playfully runs his hands along the waistband of his pants.

Eugene turns serious immediately, all embarrassment forgotten. "Snafu…" he says with warning.

"C'mon Gene, you're the only virgin in the company!" Snafu cajoles him, "I'll bet you never even jacked off once in all these years overseas."

"I don't see how that's any business of yours or anyone else's," Eugene says in a voice equally as tight as Snafu feels in Eugene's body. 

"Spare me the catholic guilt," Snafu says. "Sledgehammer, you need this. You don't even have to do a thing. I'll just run along to the shower, and come right back, and you'll feel like a new man"

"I can't tell if you're offering to have sex in my body or jerk off in it," Eugene complains.

"Who would I be having sex with in the barracks' shower, Gene?" Snafu asks with glee.

"I…" Eugene starts. He doesn't blush red, because he's inside Snafu and Snafu's body is less susceptible to such things. But Snafu knows Eugene well enough to read his expressions. And he's making the expression Eugene always makes when he is flustered and blushing redder than a fire engine.

Snafu laughs, "Damn, lost my bet to myself."

"What?" Eugene asks.

"I thought for sure I'd be able to make my face blush with you under it. Since you're so easily embarrassed and all," Snafu says. He leans back against the bed again and stretches his arms out along the mattress like he's sitting at the swankiest booth in a bar. Snafu shifts his hips till he's comfortable - he wasn't kidding about Eugene being wound as tight as a rubber band - and crosses his legs at the ankle.

Eugene watches him do all of this with great concentration.

"I almost forgot the dessert!" Snafu exclaims excitedly. He shifts through the empty boxes in his paper bag of food to find a smaller container full to the brim with pastries. "No spice here. They call this the sweetheart cake." He takes one for himself and then passes the rest to Eugene.

Eugene takes it and pulls one out, looking at it skeptically.

Snafu bites into the flakey pastry - a small enough mouthful he won't eat the entire thing in one go, but big enough to reach the filling. It's absolutely delicious. There aren't many sweets available in the city right now. War shortages hit everywhere. So this tiny taste of sugar is heaven. Snafu moans around the pastry as he sinks his teeth into the next bite, and licks buttery flakes off his lip. He closes his eyes to savour every second of flavor and sighs with pleasure.

"Okay," Eugene says in a strained, hasty voice.

"Hmm?" Snafu asks with his mouth still full. He opens his eyes to see Eugene staring at him and breathing shallowly.

"Okay, you can go to the showers," Eugene says.

"What?" Snafu's jaw drops open. A little piece of pastry falls out.

"I said, you can go to the showers," Eugene repeats.

"Sledgehammer, I was joking," Snafu says. Never one to waste food, he picks his dropped piece of pastry up from his lap and pops it back into his mouth.

"I'm giving you permission…" Sledge continues.

"I don't want your permission, Gene," Snafu protests, "I ain't gonna do something you don't actually want…"

"I do," Eugene interrupts - a little too loud, "I do want you...to…"

"Gene, if you can't even say it…"

"I want you to jack my body off in the shower, Snafu," Eugene says forcibly.

Snafu sits in stunned silence. He licks his lips. There's still a trace of sugar left over from the pastry.

"Okay," Snafu shrugs. He gets up and snags the towel hanging off the bed's footboard, "I'll be back before you can finish those sweetheart cakes." He throws Eugene a wink and saunters out the door.

Ten minutes later Snafu is standing alone in a shower stall, staring at the tile. It's surprisingly well maintained, and very clean - probably the only part of the barracks that is. Not a single spec of mold in the place. He'll miss this when he gets back home.

But he should not be thinking of shower cleanliness right now.

Snafu thought this would be easy.

He glances down at his body. Surprisingly, it does nothing for him. He's seen Eugene naked many, many times in many situations (except the one Snafu wants). This opportunity isn't nearly as exciting as he thought it'd be.

He can't even bring himself to touch himself - Eugene? - down there. Things are just kinda droopy, including his mood. Apparently it isn't the body Snafu wants, it's the person inside it. And the wrong person is inside it right now.

Fucking weird, is what it is.

He showers off perfunctorily, uses soap, even washes behind his ears, brushes his teeth, shaves - does everything proper exactly how he watches Eugene do it. And then he towels off, and heads back to their room.

Eugene must have expected him to take a lot longer because Snafu opens the door to find Eugene lying in Snafu's bed. Eugene's hand is wrapped around his dick and he's practically arching off the mattress.

Snafu drops his towel in shock. 

"Shit!" Eugene curses and scrambles to cover himself.

Meanwhile Snafu hastily kicks the towel into the room, steps inside, and shuts the door before he ends up mooning the whole hallway. "No need to cover up, I have far more personal experience with this scene than you do," Snafu says and tosses the towel at Eugene's head.

"I'm sorry, I should have asked first," Eugene pushes himself up onto his elbows and looks pleadingly apologetic.

"Lie back," Snafu tells him.

"Why?" Eugene asks.

"I know my own body better than you do, I can help you out. Lie back," Snafu explains.

Gene complies.

Snafu perches on the edge of the bed so his back is towards Eugene and the position of Snafu's hand can feel as natural as possible - like he's still in his own body and this is a normal night. And then Snafu does what he does best.

Eugene cries out in surprise when he comes. It takes exactly the amount of time Snafu thought it would. He fishes the towel from off the floor and wipes Eugene and his own hand down after.

Gene sits up and slumps against Snafu's back. They're both shirtless and their skin sticks together like cooked pasta. Eugene's forehead presses hot against Snafu's neck. Snafu feels each ragged, slowly calming, breath Gene takes.

"Fuck," Eugene whispers.

"Have you really never done that before?" Snafu asks

"Good christian boys don't," Eugene replies.

Snafu rolls his eyes, "Yeah, but I find it hard to believe you've never tried. Obviously even good christian boys still want to." Snafu gestures to the messy towel.

"No, I haven't wanted to masturbate," Eugene says, matter of fact, "Never have, and never questioned it."

And something about the way he says it makes Snafu believe him. "You're serious?" Snafu asks.

Eugene nods emphatically, "Never felt the urge. Not until I thought about…" He goes quiet.

"Not until you thought about what?" Snafu smirks, feeling like maybe he introduced Eugene to more than one pleasure tonight. He shifts in his seat so he can turn around to watch Eugene's expression.

"Nothing," Eugene bites his lip nervously. 

It startles Snafu. For the first time since they woke up, Eugene actually looks like the body he is in. And with shock, Snafu realizes it's because chewing on his lip is an anxious habit Eugene picked up from him.

"Thought about what?" Snafu prompts again, "thought about me going out to the brothels tonight and giving your body the ride of its life?"

"No…" Eugene furrows his brow, "I was imagining you in the shower...touching me. I haven't thought about myself before but...sometimes I think about you."

That shuts Snafu up. He has no response prepared for this. He turns back around so he doesn't have to see the look of utter confusion on Gene's face.

Turning around was a bad idea though because it lets Gene scoot forward closer and lean against Snafu's back again.

Eugene nuzzles against Snafu's neck and brushes his lips over the skin behind Snafu's ear.

"Hey Gene?" Snafu asks softly.

"Yeah?" Gene replies, his voice soft, tired, on the verge of deeply relaxed sleep.

"Why'd you kiss back?" Snafu asks, "When I kissed you in bed, why'd you not push me away?"

"Because I love you, Snaf…" Eugene proclaims freely - his brain clearly running on no filter right now, "Because I thought…" Eugene trails off into quiet contemplation.

"Thought?" Snafu asks.

Eugene heaves a great sigh. He snakes his arms around Snafu's waist and holds him tight.

"You thought?" Snafu asks again.

"I thought you kissed me just to kiss me," Eugene says.

"Naw," Snafu admits, "I kissed me so I'd be getting a kiss from you. Because I thought I was you."

"Next time I want a kiss for me," Gene declares firmly, "Just me."

Snafu looks down in his lap where Eugene's hands are interlocked just above Snafu's waist. "Sure Sledgehammer," Snafu says, "I can do that."

"Good," Eugene murmurs. His head leans heavily against Snafu's shoulder.

"You fallin' asleep on me?" Snafu asks.

"Mmm, if I close my eyes I forget you're not you," Eugene mumbles. He draws Snafu in towards his body till Eugene's chest is flush with Snafu's back.

"I am me, just prettier," Snafu says.

Eugene snorts. He sounds a lot like Snafu when he does it. "I was hoping you'd go for a stronger descriptor...handsome? Suave? Strapping?"

"Naw, Eugene, you're pretty. Your brow is delicate, your nose is elegant," Snafu argues, "Baby birds probably sing for you when you take your lonely forest walks."

"Your mouth is the prettiest thing I've ever seen," Eugene argues back. He stretches his arms and runs his palms down Snafu's legs to his knees.

Snafu splays his legs open and slowly relaxes into Eugene's touch.

Eugene trails a finger up Snafu's thigh to his hip. "I don't know how to do this," he whispers in Snafu's ear.

Snafu's breath stutters and he leans his head back on Eugene's shoulder.

Eugene kisses his neck. He palms Snafu's stomach and slides his hand down closer, closer, but not touching, "I'm afraid I'll disappoint you."

"That don't really matter," Snafu replies quietly, "Just as long as you want to try. No disappointment in that."

Eugene nods against the nape of Snafu's neck. And he finally, finally takes hold of Snafu's dick.

Well - technically Eugene's dick. But the sensation and pleasure is all Snafu's at the moment.

"I want to see you like this," Eugene whispers as Snafu starts breathing hard and thrusts into Eugene's hand, "Your eyes, your face, your hands holding onto me. I've been imagining it for months, I want the real deal."

"Fuck, Gene," Snafu moans.

"It's not fair that when this finally happens, all I got to look at is myself," Eugene smiles into Snafu's skin.

Snafu snorts with laughter. He squeezes his eyes shut and tilts his head so he can awkwardly kiss Eugene behind him.

"Do you remember that night you broke all the windows in the group barracks?" Eugene asks.

"Yeah?" Snafu pants. He's close. He can't quite tell how close, he has a feeling anything Eugene's body experiences will come as a bit of a surprise, kind of like the spicy food. But god everything is sharp as a pin and all Snafu can concentrate on is the movement of Eugene's hand.

"This is all I dreamt about - you, naked," Eugene confesses as he works Snafu over, "Every night I slept in your bed."

Snafu wants to ask Gene why the hell he didnt say so sooner, but Snafu's beyond words at this point so all he manages is a single drawn out, "Fuck."

Eugene's a little clumsy with the pacing, and Snafu continuously nears the edge before Eugene pauses or switches tactics or gets distracted from pressing kisses along Snafu's shoulder and accidentally slows down. But it's fucking amazing and Eugene's sturdy hold keeps him open and pliant the entire time. Snafu's never felt so...caressed before.

When Snafu comes it's a revelation.

And not just cause Eugene's body has never done this before.

Snafu slumps back into Eugene's arms, completely wrung out. "God damn, Sledgehammer. Didn't know you had it in you."

Eugene hums. He releases his hold on Snafu and falls back onto the bed. "Sleep with me," Eugene pleads.

"Yeah?" Snafu asks eagerly. He snaps his head around to face Eugene. "Now? Like this?"

"Like before, when it was cold," Eugene elaborates, "Come sleep beside me."

Snafu stares at him for a minute and then chuckles, "Sledgehammer, for someone who is supposed to be an expert in classic literature or some shit, we really need to work on how you phrase things."

Eugene pats the bed next to him.

Snafu lies down while awkwardly keeping a four inch gap of mattress between them. He stares at the ceiling and thinks about whether he really would be content to spend the rest of his life in Eugene's body.

Eugene starts to snore.

It surprises Snafu. He thought Eugene was as awake with inner turmoil as he was. Snafu hoists himself onto his elbow and rolls over to watch Eugene. Snafu normally doesn't sleep on his back. He supposes that's why his body is currently making noises it's never made before.

Snafu catches himself smiling down at Eugene, which is also a surprise. He's never felt this much affection for...himself? His face looks awfully unguarded in sleep. It doesn't feel like himself. Snafu likes to imagine that his usual demeanor is a lot more intimidating.

He also really needs a haircut.

"No," Eugene mutters and rolls over.

"No?" Snafu asks. He must have voiced his thoughts out loud without realizing.

"As long as I'm stuck like this, I refuse to cut your hair. I like it long," Eugene announces stubbornly, "Also no, you were never intimidating."

"Does this mean I can cut your hair?" Snafu asks.

"Cut how much?" Eugene asks nervously.

"Buzz it all off," Snafu replies.

"What?" Eugene's eyes snap open in fright, "Snafu, please, you can't. My head's shaped oddly, a short haircut just isn't going to work!"

"Someone's vain!" Snafu taunts.

"Shelton," Eugene begs.

"Sledgehammer," Snafu runs his hand over his own head, flattening it and then letting the fluffy red locks bounce back into place piece by piece. "Bzzzzzz," Snafu pantomimes clipping it off.

"You can't be serious," Eugene says, "Stop tormenting me."

"You're gonna go bald one day, Gene," Snafu argues, "I'm just helping nature along…"

"I will not!" Eugene sounds scandalized, "Take that back!"

Snafu laughs and rolls on top of Eugene to slide his leg between Gene's knees. "Don't worry," Snafu says, "You'll always be a carrot top to me, even without hair." He leans in and kisses Eugene on the cheek.

Eugene turns his face in time to catch Snafu's lips with his own.

Snafu smiles when he pulls away from their chaste kiss. He successfully woke Eugene up. Sledgehammer's now almost as alert as Snafu is, and Snafu feels less alone. Snafu throws an arm posessively across Eugene's chest (his arm goes a long way, Eugene's body has greater reach than his own; Snafu could get used to that) and snuggles into Gene's side.

Eugene runs a hand down Snafu's arm and holds him comfortably. He chuckles, bucks his hips up into Snafu's to settle into a better position for sleeping. "What if Burgie walks in again?" Eugene asks, ever the rational one.

"We say our radiator is broken," Snafu says, completely ignoring the fact that they're both butt naked and it's so hot in the room that even blankets feel suffocating.

"Better turn the radiator off then," Eugene warns and Snafu can hear the grin in his voice despite the dark.

Snafu crawls over Eugene to turn off the radiator. He bangs his shin on the bed frame, he isn't used to the extra few inches of height. Eugene reaches up to grab his hips and stabilizes Snafu before he falls over the bed and hurts himself further. Eventually Snafu does succeed in shutting off the radiator. It hisses and clanks ominously. Snafu doesn't know if he will be as successful in turning it back on again. "Won't we get cold?" Snafu asks, although he feels pleasantly warm at the moment. Eugene's body naturally runs hotter than Snafu's.

"I'll keep you warm," comes Eugene's predictable answer. Eugene lies in wait for Snafu on the bed, his arms outstretched and welcoming.

Snafu lets himself fall into Eugene's embrace and Eugene folds his arms around him.

"Looks like you're the one on top now," Eugene comments.

"Technically I'm the one with the carrot on my head too," Snafu retorts.

"Will things change when it all goes back to normal?" Eugene asks, "Between us, I mean."

"I don't want this to be just one night, Gene," Snafu promises.

"Good," Eugene says with renewed confidence, "Good."

"Some things gotta change though," Snafu points out.

"What things?" Eugene asks.

"Can't take showers with you anymore," Snafu cautions.

"Why not?" Eugene sounds so innocently confused.

"You next to me, with water running down your neck, and us naked in full view of twenty other guys?" Snafu says, "Men get beaten up for less."

"You can't control yourself?" Eugene laughs.

"Around you?" Snafu grins.

"Huh," Eugene surmises when he realizes Snafu is being serious, "I've never had that problem. I've always felt the opposite. Takes effort for me to even become interested in someone, and I can turn it off easy." Eugene shrugs, "Still want to see you in a shower someday though."

Snafu snorts and shoves his nose into the crook of Eugene's neck.

"When I saw you for the first time on Pavuvu you annoyed the heck out of me," Eugene continues.

"Was it my charm?" Snafu asks.

"I found you attractive," Eugene says, as if this is shocking, "And I'd never had to think about attraction before. Not like that...not like…" Eugene goes quiet.

"Like what?" Snafu asks.

"Like…" Eugene thinks hard, "Like half the time I wanted to shut you up, but the only reason I even cared to shut you up was cause I could see you were thriving on the attention I was giving you."

"They say if you look into someone's eyes long enough you can fall in love with anybody," Snafu claims.

"That why you kept trying to get me to look into yours?" Eugene asks.

"You know all my tricks, Sledgehammer," Snafu drawls.

"You needn't have tried so hard, I was already head over heels," Eugene says.

Snafu laughs and props himself up on Eugene's chest so he can see his face in the moonlight. "I think I could tell," Snafu admits.

Eugene grins wide. He looks up into Snafu's face and cups his cheeks. They can't see much, in the dark. "Your eyes feel the same," Eugene whispers, "I know they're not, I recognize my own face and eyes, but...I feel you behind them…"

Snafu licks his lips to keep from smiling, "Think you're feeling something else Gene." He digs his hips and half hard erection into Eugene's leg.

Eugene laughs and grips Snafu's hips till he stops wiggling. "I'm tired, Snaf," Eugene shakes his head and smiles, "Save it for when we're ourselves again."

Snafu chuckles, and agrees. He falls back onto Eugene's chest and sighs. "Hey Gene?" Snafu asks.

"Hmm?"

Eugene is almost asleep again. Snafu can hear it in his voice.

Snafu turns his head towards Gene, leans in a few scant inches, and then - a chaste kiss

"That one was just for you," Snafu tells him.

His eyes still closed, Eugene smiles. 

"Love you too, Gene," Snafu says before he falls asleep himself.

\--------

Snafu wakes up with Eugene sprawled on top of him, butt naked. Which is when Snafu remembers he never put clothes back on Eugene's body after the shower last night. Eugene is heavy, and warm, and his arm is carefully wrapped around Snafu like he's holding something precious.

Snafu can't help but smile. He wiggles an arm out from underneath Eugene's shoulder and runs his hand through Eugene's hair.

Eugene slowly wakes up. He lifts his head to meet Snafu's eyes.

Snafu freezes, and takes both hands off Eugene's body, worried that maybe, somehow, yesterday was entirely a dream.

Eugene returns the smile when he sees Snafu's face. Snafu's real and proper face. "Oh thank heaven," Eugene says - in his own voice with his own beautiful accent that Snafu wants to listen to forever - and then presses forward to kiss Snafu deeply.


End file.
